Message in a battle

I had a fight with my sibling today through SMS. And I am sad because we had misunderstood each other. I do not know how to resolve the battle between us and the battle with in me. The issue we had fought about are piled issues of the past. We both burst like a dormant volcano until we both were already too exhausted to fight. I do not know how to resolve the issues between us and it saddens me.

Looking into the brighter side, I had realized many things like: we both know how to exploit the use of technology (see we fought through the SMS)Ü.

Second, I realize the importance of patience and practice broadening my understanding on the point of view of the other side. Indeed, being empathic could help extinguish anger. We quarreled because we are both in a bad mood and we are in a bad mood because something bad/sad happened with in our day. So the next time we are provoked, we have to check ourselves and be slow to anger in order for us to avoid ending in a fight with others (or even with ourselves). Let’s try to discern the hardships other might be into at the moment of our anger.

Third, I realize the importance of an open communication. And open communication means settling things down in person. Maybe a percentage of our misunderstanding can be attributed to the fact that we are just using technology and thus we had disregarded concealed efforts of reaching out. Our fight actually was triggered by a message from me, which he misinterpreted into something like I blame him. But for me, my intention is just to let him see the chances he missed. If only I had said my message in person instead of using my cell phone perhaps we ended as friends and analytical of the missed out chances and both of us might had learned together.

Fourth, conflicts are normal to happen to normal people. What would make the conflict painful/hard or even too painful/too hard to bear is the way we handle it. We tend to be irrational and emotional every time we are hurt, emotionally assailed or at times even when we are criticized. I had realized that we are endowed with both the head and the heart for us to use it together at all times. If we use the power of both our faculty (head and heart) then maybe we will derive to a well-considered decision. The next time we are being criticized, emotionally assailed or the next time we get hurt, we have to pause for a while to mull over the reason behind every scorn.

Fifth, nobody wins in any battle.